Living with Autism and ADHD

Working with young adults, two of the most common questions that I receive from parents and loved ones are "What is it like having ADHD?" and "What is it like being autistic?" I wanted to take the time to write a post that briefly outlines what your loved one may be experiencing. Please note that everyone's experience is different and what I have outlined here aren't "rules" or everyone's lived experience.

Before we dive in, I want to clarify some terminology that I'll be using:

• Support Needs: Autism is diagnosed as being level I, II, or III. This refers to the level of support that the individual may need. Note that support needs can fluctuate.

• Neurotypical: An individual that is not autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, or otherwise has a difference in cognition.

• Neurodivergent: An individual that has a difference in cognition.

  
  

Autism Spectrum Disorder

I have found that autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is one of the most misunderstood forms of neurodivergence. Autistic individuals frequently get accused of being narcissistic or behaving in certain ways for attention. This cannot be further from the case. First and foremost, it is essential to understand that ASD is centered around hypersensitivity of the nervous system. What does this mean? It means that autistic individuals do not experience sensory input the way that a neurotypical (NT) person would. For example, I am hypersensitive to touch, so if I don't expect that someone is about to touch me, I will have an extreme startle response. When I'm sick, I have extreme sensitivity to temperature, so something like having a fan on can be physically painful for me.

One of the other hallmarks of ASD is social skills deficits. Like everything else with ASD, everything is on a spectrum, but generally speaking, autistic individuals struggle to pick up on social cues due to how their brain is wired. For a person with low support needs, this may look like issues determining if someone is joking or being sarcastic. Other individuals may take everything too seriously and think that people are intentionally being mean when that may or may not actually be the case. The autistic brain is highly logical, thus social cues can be like a foreign language; however, autistic individuals can be hyper-empathetic, meaning that they feel emotions deeply, but often don't have the ability to communicate this to others. To the NT individual, this can come across as the person being "cold," whereas in reality, the autistic individual just doesn't have the ability to express these emotions how they wish.

ADHD

ADHD is classified into one of three subtypes: Predominantly inattentive (ADHD-PI), predominantly hyperactive (ADHD-PH), and combined (ADHD-C). Neurologically speaking, ADHD is marked by deficits in activity within the prefrontal cortex (part of the brain responsible for impulse control, planning, and other higher level functions) and the hippocampal formation (part of the brain responsible for memory). Due to these deficits, ADHD individuals struggle with remembering day to day tasks and may struggle with thoughts "bouncing around" in their minds. While these differences may seem "rude" to a NT individual, for the ADHDer, they are just trying to process and make sense of the world around them. If you wish to help, things like prompting and reminders can be immensely benefical, but remember that these accommodations don't cure ADHD, it just makes things slightly easier to manage.

How Can Matthew Help?

As outlined in my bio, I have lived expeirence with being legally blind, hard of hearing, having cerebral palsy, and neurodivergence in addition to being a clinician. I approach every case from a place of empathy and do my best to help families and individauls come to terms with what they're experiencing in addition to addressing behaviors or unhelpful beliefs that may contribute to the concerns that brought you to me in the first place. My experience isn't your experience or your loved one's experience; however, I can relate and I will do my best to understand your needs. For ADHD and/or ASD, this looks like us working together to process the emotions surrounding your diagnosis and giving you actionable tools to assist. For example, I will frequently employ the use of apps to assist with things like understanding the tone of an email or apps that can break down tasks so that they seem less overwhelming.